


Captain Hook

by lostalongtthewayy



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, cs fluff, daddy killian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 10:26:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14306706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostalongtthewayy/pseuds/lostalongtthewayy
Summary: Captain Hook is a father —a clichéd, loving, amazingly doting father that would do anything in the world for his daughter. Anything. Even dress up as that horrid, beyond wrong, caricatured version of himself.





	Captain Hook

— ღ   —

Is a sight she never thought she’d see, one she has certainly  _pictured_ , she can’t lie there, but seeing it, for  _real_ , right before her eyes, is undoubtedly something beyond her wildest dreams.

It still takes everything Emma has not to burst out laughing at the sight of  _him —like that—_ immediately.

She knows Killian’s aware she’s watching him, but he still doesn’t turn, too focused studying his own reflection in the mirror.

“Perms  _are_ bad.”

Emma nods tightly at that —clearly the understatement of the century. “ _Yeah_ ,  _I know._ ”

He’s quiet for another beat, more thoroughly examining himself in the mirror.

He’s dressed  to the nines —as  _Hook, Captain Hook_ and while Emma is still not positively sure she isn’t dreaming it, she can appreciate all the effort Killian clearly went through to get the look right. He thought of everything; the fake gigantic wig , the twirly mustache, the great red coat and even bigger hat. He’s even using a cheap oversized plastic hook in place of his usual one right now.

He heaves a sigh then, looking away from the mirror for a moment, and Emma can tell he’s resigned himself to his seeming fate.

“Well, I still  _have_ to do this.”

Emma moves closer to him, stands beside him so that their eyes meet in the mirror. “You don’t  _have to,_ though,” she tells him softly, leaning onto his side.

Killian turns to her, looking uneasy, yet somehow determined at the same time. “I do.” He insists.

Emma gives him a look, pulling back from him and shaking her head. “Estella is  _four_ ,” she reminds him needlessly. “She probably already forgot you promised her…” She pauses, waving a hand in his general direction. “ _This_ …”

Killian’s nose wrinkles in something like apprehension — _or_  disgust, maybe— before he speaks. “That may be true,” he agrees, but then shakes his head once more.

“But?”

“But I’m a man of my word, Swan. I gave Estella my word, so I shall keep it.”

Emma regards him for a few seconds quietly, considering just how worth it is to try to change his mind, but then simply decides against it.

The man is a stubborn one, she can give him that. “If you’re sure…”

Killian meets her eyes. “Aye,” he says, nodding at her. He using his hand to cup her jaw then, smiling at her just that much more purposefully before kissing her. “After all love, what would the world be like without Captain Hook, eh?”

It makes her giggle; an honest, carefree and silly giggle escapes her before he’s kissing her mouth again. Her hand comes up to his chest when he pulls back, his eyes determined yet soft on hers, making her smile. “Whatever would we do without you, huh?” She says, before quickly adding, “I love you, thank you for doing this for Estella.”

It makes him smile, relax a little at last too, but then before she can say more, Killian’s leaning in kissing her again.

— ღ   —

It takes Emma all of one look of Estella at preschool pick up, to know today wasn’t the best for her kid.

“You okay?”

Estella barely spares her a look before climbing on the backseat of the car and buckling her seatbelt. She just sits there and stares at Emma, eyes sad and guarded.

“What’s wrong?”

She shrugs.

“All right,” Emma says, trying to decide whether to push it or not. In the end, she says, “You tell mom if she can help, right?”

Estella sighs, but at least she nods her head at the question.

Emma nods as well. “Okay.” She says back. She smiles at Estella, but isn’t met with much in return.

They drive home in almost complete silence, which is as odd as anything, but Emma decides she’ll worry if Estella isn’t back to her normal self after her usual afternoon nap. Maybe her kid is just tired.

Maybe she should have checked with Killian how show-and-tell went earlier too.

— ღ   —

“Whoa, blast from the past much?”

Emma’s words don’t shock him; he feels much of the same as he stares at his old pirate coat on the bed in front of him.

Killian still tries not to make a big deal out of this; he looks over at Emma and just shrugs.

She groans and rolls her eyes in response to that, of course.

She puts her hands on her hips then and just stares at him strongly. “All right now, everybody has been acting weird today. Don’t you think is time you let me in on it?”

It is.

Killian’s face falls, he pinches his nose and makes himself breathe deeply.

Emma doesn’t urge him to speak further right away, but he can feel her presence right there beside him, patiently waiting until he’s ready to do this.

She moves to sit at the edge of the bed, looking up at him as she pats the empty space beside her.

“I don’t bite.” She tells him, and he can’t help the small smile that it brings.

He sits beside her without much thought, mechanically reaching for her hand and holding her on his thigh.

Killian turns to look at her, smiling sadly immediately at the hopeful smile on Emma’s face. “You can talk to me.” She says, even though he already knows that.

It does give him that last small push he needs to just tell her what happened. “Show and tell at Estella’s school didn’t go too well today.”

Emma nods at his words. “All right, I figured as much since picking up Estella,” she tells him. “She didn’t really say much, though.”

Killian’s heart immediately breaks for his sweet little lass; he knows the whole ordeal made her upset beyond measure and yet…

Yet he couldn’t even face her afterwards.

The worst of it all is that she honestly,  _truly_ , didn’t understand what was going on. 

“It wasn’t too serious but I…I believe it still upset the lass quite a bit.”

“What happened?”

Killian lets out a breath,  _what the bloody hell_. “Some of her classmates were frightened by my presence in her classroom.”

“Wait, what?”

He understands her confusion; he wasn’t expecting what happened today at all. “Estella was rather excited to introduce me to her mates. You should have seen her face; she was  _so very_ happy and excited, but then…”

Emma squeezes his hand when he trails off, and it  _kills him,_ because it really shouldn’t be such a big deal, and yet here they are. “Some of the lads in her class just wouldn’t stop crying at the sight of me, another one was mocking Estella,  _and_ pirates, and then the rest just stared at us both as mayhem unfolded…”

Emma’s eyes widen, slowly processing what he’s saying.

“Her teacher tried her best, but in the end she kindly asked me if we could leave this for some other day—”

“So she made you leave?”

“Aye,” Killian replies, his eyes down. “I mean, she didn’t  _explicitly_  tell me to go but—”

“Yeah, I can imagine…” Emma finishes the thought for him. “You didn’t talk to Estella afterwards, did you?”

“No,” he replies and can’t exactly hide the shame in his voice. “She was so confused, love. I wanted to explain, I wanted to soothe her but…I don’t know,” he pauses, shaking his head. “I thought about picking her up myself from preschool; explain to her what happened but…”

“You needed time.”

“Aye.” He nods. Of course his Swan knows him better than he even knows himself. “I didn’t know what I was going to tell her. She’s my daughter, I won’t lie to her, but —all the same, I don’t want to hurt her or for her—”

“She’s  _never_  going to be afraid of you, Killian.”

Killian sighs deeply. He closes his eyes and tries to believe in the truth of Emma’s words.

The thought alone of his daughter being scared of him, of learning all the terrible things he’s done is almost enough to bring him to tears.

Thinking perhaps one day she won’t feel pride when introducing him to his mates, but shame instead.

He has a lifetime of sins behind him and it eats at him the fact that Estella may hate him for it one day.

“Killian.”

Emma’s voice brings him back to reality, but he’s still in much unease to properly look at her.

She carries on speaking, in any case. “You’re her hero, Killian. You know that,” she tells him, softly. “She loves you  _so_  much, that isn’t going to change. I’m not shocked it upset her to see other children seeing you differently.”

Killian nods, but he’s still not through his heartache. “I want to help her understand.”

Emma’s eyes shift to the black coat on the bed. “Hence the pirate coat now?”

“I guess?” He answers, although he’s not entirely sure himself. “I’m not the caricature pirate I dressed up for her today  —I’m not that character from her storybooks and films but…I  _am_ a pirate, not so much so the same as before but…”

“A pirate nonetheless,” Emma says, and he nods. “It’s not as though Estella doesn’t know this. Don’t forget that Killian.”

Ever since she was a tiny toddler, Estella has wanted to be just like her dad —and mom too. She’s dreamed forever to be a pirate that also so happens to be a princess; sailing the high seas while also having tea parties of sorts above and below deck of the Jolly Roger herself.

The fact that she’s the daughter of the one and only Captain Hook, has never been a secret to her —has never fazed her.

Still, the fact that this is true  _now_  doesn’t mean it’ll stay true in the future.

Estella is four and while still incredibly young, at some point they will have to start sharing with her all the hard truths.

“You’re right love, but…there’s much about being a pirate Estella is not aware of. I think it  _is_ my job to help her understand it all, no?”

“I guess.” Emma says, but then quickly adds. “Nothing you ever tell her is going to change how much she loves you, you  _do_  know this right?”

Killian sees the sincerity in her eyes as she speaks, and in that moment, he can only cling to that conviction for dear life. “I sure hope so, love…”

— ღ   —

“You’re going on a walk with Daddy, huh?”

“Mmhmm,” Estella replies without even looking at her.

Emma chuckles softly under her breath. “Mommy can’t come huh?”

“Oh no,” Estella says quickly, eyes widening. “Daddy said it’s just me and him!” She declares.

Emma smiles at her. “I guess I’ll just stay home then, make you some cocoa for when you come back?”

Estella’s eyes lit up. “Yes please!”

“It’s a bit windy out there; take a sweater at least okay?”

“Okay mummy.”

— ღ   —

Emma watches them from the kitchen; Killian and Estella are in the living room almost ready to go. He’s on his knees in front of her; helping her button a cream cable knit sweater Estella loves.

Emma always finds special the way Estella looks at Killian sometimes.  _Most times_ , actually.

It’s almost magical to watch them when they are just being  _them —_ the way her little eyes follow his every move with such awe and love. The way Killian is so especially cautious and gentle with  _her._

To this day, he’s still just as careful with her as he was when she was a newborn. He still  _always_ picks her up with extreme care, strokes her little face with so much love and softness,  _every time_.

She’s simply his little princess, and Emma loves that.

Her heart effectively grows in size at the way Killian then kisses Estella’s nose when he’s done with her sweater. He’ll argue her on this, but parenthood comes so effortlessly and natural to him. It is as though loving on this baby is something he has been doing forever. Something he was born for.

Captain Hook is a father —a clichéd, loving, amazingly doting father that would do anything in the world for his daughter. Emma doesn’t have a doubt about it and she knows in her heart, Estella will always see it too.

— ღ   —

“So what do you think?”

Estella looks up at him, thoughtful as ever. “It looks heavy, daddy.”

Killian smiles, holding onto her little hand just a wee bit tighter. “It  _is_  heavy, love.”

Estella scrunches up her nose. “Is not comfy?”

“Um, not especially.”

“Why do you wear it then?”

“Well, I don’t really wear it anymore much —have you ever seen me in it before?”

“Nope,” she replies simply, shaking her little head.

They forewent the beanie for this walk, so her wavy blonde hair is free and wild as the wind blows around them.

Killian brought then to the beach; he figured a talk with his daughter about his past needed the proximity of water at least. The evening is lovely, if slightly windy, but is still warm enough that he’s comfortable with Estella outdoors.

The sun hasn’t quite set yet, making the sky look an assortment of pastel colors and it comforts him. At the very least,  _that_ part of their walk is perfect.

Now if only he could think of the right words to explain all that he needs to his daughter.

“How come you don’t wear it anymore daddy?”

Estella has stopped walking, letting go of his hand so that she can look up at him properly.

Killian has to try his best to push aside the fear that she’ll hate him one day, and instead forces himself to focus in her eyes. Her impossibly blue eyes that so perfectly match his own.

“I don’t really need the pirate coat these days, love.”

She nods at him. “But you’re still a pirate right?”

“Aye little love.”

“You’re sure? Even without the big heavy coat?”

“Yeah, even without this big old thing,” he says, making a show of looking at his coat.

Estella seems satisfied with his answer, smiling at him brightly and reaching without thought for his hand again.

Killian allows them to walk for a few more minutes in silence —he loves his walks with Estella. It’s a thing  _they_ do, and he cherishes it fully. Once upon a time, she used to be small enough that he could strap her to his chest in a carrier.

These days she manages to do  _almost_  all the walking herself, opting for his arms —or shoulders— near the end when her little legs grow tired.

Killian will  _never_ complain about it.

There are some ships in the distance that they see then. Killian beams with pride when Estella spots them and excitedly asks him to tell her  _all_  about them. Killian obliges, he  _has_ to, but then when he’s done, he thinks maybe it’s time he does a little more of the actual talking he’s supposed to be doing with his daughter. “Do you know what pirates do Estella?”

“ _Of course,_ daddy!” She replies as if he’s more than a little silly for asking her  _that_. “They sail the high seas!”

“Aye, too right love, what else?”

“Um, BUCKLE SOME SWASH?!” She nearly shouts at him before bursting into belly giggles.

Killian has a hard time keeping his face straight at that one, and ends up laughing with her. “Aye, aye, little love, something like that.” He tells her, before straightening his face again. “What about pillage and plunder?”

“Yeah that too,” Estella replies, almost mechanically before she thinks more of it, and frowns. “Wait, what does  _that_  mean, daddy?”

“It merely means stealing treasure from others.”

“Oh,” she says, her smile gone. “Stealing is not good.”

“No,” Killian agrees simply. “It’s actually very poor form, love. But once upon a time, a long long time ago, before you were born, before I had even met your mum, dad was that kind of a pirate. Very mean and sad and not really great at following rules.”

Estella’s still frowning, but Killian knows she understands what he’s saying. His daughter is one smart lass and she gets it all from Emma.

“Did you ever get in trouble?”

Killian nods. “A lot.”

And despite everything, despite how heavy he feels in that moment on account of his many sins, the second Estella snickers at his words, Killian instantly feels just a little bit lighter.

“Good,” she tells him eventually, and Killian can only nod, properly scolded.

“Did you hurt people? Like Captain Hook in the movie?”

“Sometimes.”

“That’s not good Daddy.”

“I know love.”

Estella’s lips purse. “Did you say you’re sorry?”

“Um, aye, every time I was able to, I did…”

Her little face lights up and she nods strongly looking up at him. “That’s good, daddy!”

“Aye little love.”

Estella reaches up and holds onto his hand with both of hers,  _tightly_. “I’m going to tell Christopher and everybody that you’re not the pirate from the movie.”

“Yeah?”

“Mmhm,” Estella nods, swinging their hands. “I’m going to tell him you  _are_ a pirate but a good one and he shouldn’t be afraid of you. Good Pirates never hurt children right daddy?”

“Too right love,  _never_.”

“That’s good.”

“I’m glad you think so…” Killian smiles fully at Estella then —it’s not absolution, it’s not the last of this conversation that the two of them will have, and yet he knows now little by little they’ll get there.

They walk in silence for a just a while longer, the sun is properly starting to set, the wind picking up making him regret not bringing a beanie for Estella.

Just as he’s about to tell her maybe they should start heading home, Estella stops him cold in his tracks and looks up at him seriously.

“What love?”

She purses her lips for a beat before she speaks. “Do you think naughty pirates would step on the toes of their mates if they ever make fun of you again?”

Killian wants to laugh —he also wants to tell how very  _not_ opposed to her way of thinking he is, but he doesn’t. He’s her father after all. “I think naughty pirates who’d like to walk the plank may do that.”

Estella’s face screws playfully. “Oh,  _darn it!”_

It warms Killian’s heart like nothing else in this world does. “You’re aware I love you  _very_ much, aye?”

“Yeah,” Estella grins up at him. “I do too,” she promises, her arms snaking around his waist tightly. “Even with this old thing on!”

— ღ   —

That night Emma hardly needs to give the pair a look as they walk in the house, holding hands, silly smiles on their faces, to know everything is well again.

As it should.

—  _fin_    —


End file.
